Sunday, January 6, 2013

Change of Heart

Everyone has certain things that we would never even consider doing. It's just not something that we would ever identify with our personality. We think "I am Anthony. I don't sit still for more than five minutes at a time" or "I am Jessica. I don't talk to people whom I do not know." We set boundaries for ourselves, and tell ourselves that we will never ever cross them.
A little over a year ago, I would have said "I'm Annabel. I don't go to church."
A few months ago, I would have said "I don't talk in front of a bunch of people."
One month ago, I would have said "I'm vegetarian. I don't serve meat to people."
Yesterday, I would have said "I am holding a grudge. I don't consider this person's feelings and I certainly do not try to comfort her."
The thing is, I think that when we set up these boundaries, we are setting ourselves up for God to stage an intervention. He will, somehow or another, knock down all of the walls we put up and leave us awed and infinitely grateful, wondering why we ever put them up. The funny thing is that it is often the things we least wanted to do that we wind up doing with the most fervor.

Holiest of Fathers, you work in incredible and mysterious ways. Today I received what was clearly a message from You, Lord. I pray that You will not let me forget that message, and that it will weigh on my heart and push me to act as You wish me to. May all of my deeds bring the kingdom of Heaven that lives within me closer to the surface.

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